Taarabu, a unique East African type of
music mainly performed during wedding ceremonies. And now, there was
one on line. My good friend Beka was marrying her long time love from
Barsheba. Maulidi Juma was performing here, at the groom's home. We
heard it was Juma Msomali with Changamwe stars performing at the
Bride's.
Though I was not the first best man, I
was happy being chosen to be one of the best men. I would wear
marching Islamic best man gown just as Kombo and Sule in the morning
for the nikah/tying of the knot. And later when we go to take the
bride, six of us will wear matching suits. Michael, Digger and Fuadi
will be the inclusion to the best men panel.
Celebrations were going on well. Ladies
belly dancing under the chandarua while men ogling on the
sides. We had to keep company the groom in the first room where we
could see the musicians and dancers outside through the window. All the best men and
friends were chewing Ghat, but I wasn't. I haven't been a fan of any
intoxicant or addiction.
Few minutes past eleven, The groom got
an sms that the bride could not be located. Some of our friends and
relatives had gone to celebrate at the bride's just as some of them had
come to ours. It was customary. We had to get up from the chairs and
sofa to go to Barsheba and inquire more about this. Mlaleo to
Barsheba was just a ten minutes walk.
Word had not spread when we reached
down there, because people were sill dancng. We found a private room where we talked with the
mother of the bride. Kibibi had disappeared at the salon where they
were doing her hair, manicure, henna and all sorts of decorations
stuff on her. We took a matatu back home then took my saloon
car to the salon which was in Kongowea. I knew the salon and the
owner, it was near my home, Ratna Square. We found two of the
bridesmaids there as startled as we were. They told us that Kibibi,
the bride had excused herself to take fresh air outside just after
her hair was done. They waited inside for five minutes before
deciding to check up on her. That's when they discovered she was
nowhere near. There was no sound of car which might have come to pick
her up, neither a noise of struggle to suggest robbery or some crime.
We were all confused, and I saw sadness
on Beka's face. I had known Beka since childhood. The soccer games
which we used paper made football, the hunt for kunazi in
Freretown area, and we even went to the same Mlaleo Primary while
many of our friends went to the neighboring Kisauni Primary school.
After standard four, we migrated to Mombasa west area and then to
Ratna square. But I did not cut ties with my childhood friends. Two
years ago, I saw them together. Beka and Kibibi in a wedding Taarab
in Mkomani where I had just gone to enjoy watching belly dancers.
He introduced her to me and we hit it off instantly. Kibibi was a
talkative girl, and fun to be with. I could understand why my friend
fell for her. I was happy for him, because he was a reserved man. Not a noisy
fellow who does his business quietly and swiftly. He was also a fan
of reggae, just like me. Kibibi will be good for him if he will make
him outgoing, I thought.
After the salon, I gave the team an
idea. Call her other friends while we go to the brides aunts and
cousins who had not yet arrived at the wedding. By five in the
morning, we had gone to every relative's home and made more than a
hundred calls but still, fruitless. The main ceremony was to be at
ten in the morning and we were so tired. We had not even started
preparing yet. We got back home to the Groom's room and threw
ourselves down to rest while pondering.
I had seen something like this on the
movie before, they call it runaway bride. I have heard it happen in
reality, but never seen it. Personally, I think it's a selfish thing
to do. People usually go to expenses and cancel their plans for you.
You got all time to cancel and inform people so that no preparations
are done. I could never believe that one did not know what he or she
was doing until the wedding day to be clear for them. Its purely
insensitive and inconsiderate. Either she is a drama queen or he just
wants to shame the other family. The only reason I can understand
for that kind of a scene is maybe one finds out on the wedding day
that their fiancee is HIV-positive. Or any other seriously evil thing
that your fiancee has been keeping from you, and you find it out on the
wedding day. It cannot be you, making up your mind about your career
or thinking about another person who you think you love.
At around seven in the morning, the
Groom received a call from the bride. After talking for about five minutes
with her, he looked down like a person nonplussed. The other
best men had gone out to look for breakfast. He told me that Kibibi
had gone hiding to one of her bridesmaid's apartment to think things
over. She had doubts and concerns and that she needed time to be sure
that she want to get in to this. She called to tell Beka not to worry
and be on time for the ceremony because she had made up her mind.
Beka asked me what he should do. I
asked him what he meant, “You should start preparing and be ready
to get married in an hour and a half.” I replied. He looked at my
eyes and saw them turning in a displeasing and worrying manner. I was
being a good best man. I wanted to make sure that the wedding
happened. Again, he asked me “Sincerely Ahmedinho, if you were the
groom and the same happened to you. What would you do?” I was tired
from the sleepless night and any more attempt to lie would have been
caught on my eyes. I looked straight in his eyes and said: I wouldn't
go on. A person has a lot of time to think before accepting to be in
a relationship with you. Before accepting the engagement, one also
had time to think about it. Time was at her disposal three months ago
after the engagement too. All that time to think and be sure before
getting in this big thing. This is a union that is supposed to last
for the rest of your lives. Its life. And I wouldn't want to enter it
with a person who is not sure she wants to be with me. If all the
goodness she has seen in me during the period of our relationship was
not enough and still has doubts a day before the wedding, then I'm
not the man for her.
Beka threw his phone angrily to the
wall and it got broken. He said I was right and he should do exactly
what I said. I Told him that was my opinion, my thinking. And it may
not necessarily be good advice for him. But he couldn't be stopped.
He left me with the responsibility of explaining it to his family,
wrote a note and gave me to take to Kibibi. I asked why and he said
if he did the explaining, they would not give him a chance to escape.
An hour later, Sule, Fuad and me were
making way between the joyful dancers waiting for the groom at
Kibibi's home. We made way inside to deliver the note from Beka to
Kibibi in the presence of her mum and dad. She did not read it aloud,
but I had read it before. It said: I have loved you Kibibi, and I
think I still do. My idea of love is one that is reciprocated. Might
not be equal, but much enough to be sure of a person I want to spend
the rest of my life with. When this surety is dented, the marriage
ride will be bumpier than normal. I want a happy marriage, and your
turn last night has led me to doubt if we are meant to be. You were
not sure, now I am not sure. So its better that we don't proceed with
something major that we are both not sure of. I think I should take a
vacation after this. Re-evaluate myself, think things over, and find
a way to build my strength to love again. For you, I wish you good in
your life.
Such were the events of the big wedding
of a friend twelve years ago. And to date, Beka is still single.
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